It’s OK to love someone who is hurtful and toxic, while keeping them at an arm’s length. This includes family and friends, as well as former business and romantic partners.
4 years ago
Being a good person does not include standing by, silently, while being endangered, shamed, embarrassed, controlled, or abused.
Charles Tadros, M.D.
September 3, 2022
Saint Louis, Missouri
Shame and embarrassment, as well as the fear of these thoughts and feelings, persist in part because we’re in the same life situations, around the same friends, same family, same work, the same ques and triggers. These people and the places that make up our environments may represent love and support, but often these people and places lock us into our same patterns, making it difficult for us to accept the unpleasant aspects of ourselves, our thoughts, our feelings, and our situations. Intentionally, or unintentionally, these people and places make it difficult for us to accept reality while still asking ourselves to change by seeing things differently, thinking differently, and behaving differently. Date January 12, 2023 In relation to accept WE SEEM TO BE ABLE TO DEAL WITH CRITICISM MUCH BETTER IF WE HAVE DEALT WITH A LOT OF IT, AND SURVIVED, OR IF WE HAVE NOT BEEN DENIED, DEPRIVED, SHAMED, EMBARRASSED OR OPPRESSED. Date July 7, 2021 In relation to criticism MOST OF US FIND OUT THE HARD WAY THAT WE CANNOT AFFORD ANY MORE ENERGY FOR THE NEGATIVE EMOTIONS OF ANGER, FEAR, ANXIETY, SHAME AND EMBARRASSMENT. UNTIL THEN, SOMEHOW, THERE SEEMS TO BE A UNIVERSAL INSTINCT THAT BY PUTTING IN TIME, MENTAL EFFORT, AND ENERGY (RELIVING, BEING ANGRY, RE-TRAUMATIZING), WE CAN ROLL BACK TIME, RECEIVE JUSTICE, BE VINDICATED, OR THE ISSUES IN QUESTION CAN BE RESOLVED IN OUR FAVOR. Date August 22, 2021 In relation to anger
