WHAT OUR PARENTS DID NOT KNOW OR NEVER TOLD US, EVEN IF WE WERE WILLING TO LISTEN…

Still make and follow plans, even if absolutely nothing will work out. Having a purpose, goals, as well as making an effort and progress toward these goals, are the essence of what fills our days.

Love, acceptance, forgiveness, patience, fairness, justice, communication, curiosity, understanding, work, learning, teaching, relationships, health, and spirituality are the foundation for everything positive in our lives.

Becoming pregnant, delivering a baby and raising a child are fraught with an unbelievable number and severity of risks. Those babies are worth all of it.

Even when we are young, we do not have enough time in this life to perform and experience everything that we will eventually want to experience. NEVERTHELESS, START NOW!

No one is ready to die. Given a choice between the end of a long life with a, “good death” versus reasonable health which allows us to spend more time with family, friends, other people and pets, we will pick the latter.

If we have to pick between the two, a steady cash flow is more important than owning assets that do not produce a cash flow.

We do not have perfect proof about what happens to us after we die. For many of us, this is one of the most frightening events to consider.

Most of us will develop one or more illnesses which lead to our eventual demise.

We will review our lives many, many, MANY times over: what we have accomplished, what we are doing now (and it’s value), what we have done (to whom, for whom, and with whom), how we have spent our time and energy, whom have we shared time with, what we believe, who are we and where are we going. Others may be distraught about our performing these life reviews, but we are comforted.

Much of who we are: our health, our energy, our wants, our needs, our relationships and our beliefs, will naturally change as we grow older.

Rote memorization is really, really, really important in life.

Many of the psychological and emotional issues that we, as adults, deal with (and at times are medicated for), started with the genes we inherited from our parents, how we were parented, as well as events from our childhood. This is not meant to blame, or to make excuses, but meant to explain.

Poor socioeconomic status in one’s youth (this is one of ALL of the factors that children can not control) puts us at risk for a lifetime of significant dysfunction, mental health issues, physical health issues, relationship issues and financial issues. Once again, this is not meant to blame, or to make excuses, but meant to explain.

Do not be too attached to ideas, stuff or people. All of these will eventually go away. Be attached just enough.

Everything which starts off with a bang, tends to peter out just as rapidly.

” You can’t tell a book by it’s cover.” is still very true. Prejudgements, snap judgements, assumptions, beliefs and prejudices are a necessary, and natural part of everyone’s life. It takes insight/recognition, a focused effort and energy in order to avoid the pitfalls of these very human cognitive biases.

It’s nice to know what one WANTs to do next, or what one WANTs to do in life. However, a focused and specific WANT may not come to mind that easily, or it may be totally unattainable for us. For many of us, knowing what we DON’T WANT has to be enough, at least for a start. Of importance is to start and to be open to experience and feedback.

Charles Tadros, M.D.

August 26, 2021

Saint Louis, Missouri

2 thoughts on “WHAT OUR PARENTS DID NOT KNOW OR NEVER TOLD US, EVEN IF WE WERE WILLING TO LISTEN…

    1. Hi Ken!
      Thank you for the book reference. I’ve put it into my Amazon book read list. Hope all is well with the family and work.
      Charles

      Like

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