Tag Archives: love

Our children are “on loan” to us parents (and to other adults) so that we can teach, protect, and provide for them until they’re able to take over these responsibilities.

It’s a common assumption, and a misconception, that if we adults donate to our children so much of our lives…our love, time, energy, and money, that we somehow “own” more of our kids, or we have dibs on what they will eventually produce. We do not. Some of us even will assume that our childrenContinue reading “Our children are “on loan” to us parents (and to other adults) so that we can teach, protect, and provide for them until they’re able to take over these responsibilities.”

Illness and suffering, our own, as well as that of others, remind us of the miracle of life, the elevation of life through love and empathy, the wonder of nature and the universe, the superficiality of physical death, and the infinite possibilities yet to be discovered.

Charles Tadros, M.D. February 7, 2023 Saint Louis, Missouri

The more I think about it, the more I see our personal health is a confluence of our genetics, proteomics, epigenetics, and our microbiome with these external factors: our education (general education and education specific to our own health), socioeconomic status, stress, nutrition, sleep, exercise, beliefs, love, connections, support, and priorities.

We may not have absolute free-will. It may be that certain biological forces sway our thoughts, perceptions, decisions, and actions much more than we realize. Charles Tadros, M.D. February 4, 2023 Saint Louis, Missouri

Shame and embarrassment, as well as the fear of these thoughts and feelings, persist in part because we’re in the same life situations, around the same friends, same family, same work, the same ques and triggers. These people and the places that make up our environments may represent love and support, but often these people and places lock us into our same patterns, making it difficult for us to accept the unpleasant aspects of ourselves, our thoughts, our feelings, and our situations. Intentionally, or unintentionally, these people and places make it difficult for us to accept reality while still asking ourselves to change by seeing things differently, thinking differently, and behaving differently.

Charles Tadros, M.D. January 12, 2023 Saint Louis, Missouri

A recent text to one of my dearest friends, regarding a very difficult time with a new diagnosis…

Your care is in very competent and kind hands. You are surrounded by a loving family. Some of life’s problems become fully resolved, never to return again. The majority of the problems that we face require a mixture of trade-offs and adjustments to living with limitations that we don’t like, but are made easier withContinue reading “A recent text to one of my dearest friends, regarding a very difficult time with a new diagnosis…”

Being open to people and showing them kindness and support does not mean that these others will abuse you or your kindness.

“You will never say or do anything to turn me against you or change my perception of you as a worthy person.”(All of us deserve to have heard this truth from our parents.) Charles Tadros, M.D. September 21, 2022 Saint Louis, Missouri

YEARS AGO, MY YOUNGEST BROTHER AND I ALMOST DROWNED TOGETHER. I’M THE ELDEST OF THREE BOYS. WE THREE WERE SWIMMING AT MY ADULT COUSINS’ APARTMENT COMPLEX’S POOL. NO LIFEGUARD ON DUTY. OUR PARENTS, WHO HAD SENT US TO THE POOL, WERE VISITING MY COUSINS, UPSTAIRS, ABOUT 50 YARDS AWAY. I WAS ABOUT 9 YEARS OLD. MY TWO BROTHERS WERE 7 AND 6 YEARS OLD. THE YOUNGEST WOULD JUMP OFF THE SIDE INTO 8 FEET OF WATER, AND THEN FURIOUSLY DOGGY PADDLE BACK TO SAFETY. THIS WOULD WORK IF HE WERE MORE HORIZONTAL WHEN PADDLING, BUT THIS ONE TIME HE WAS BOBBING VERTICALLY. SO, DOG PADDLING ONLY MADE HIM BOB UP AND DOWN MORE VIGOROUSLY, SPLASHING WATER UP INTO HIS FACE. HE BECAME PANICKED. I SAW HIM AND JUMPED IN TO HELP. MY LOVING BROTHER GRABBED ME, CLIMBED ON TOP OF ME, PUSHING ME UNDER. I WAS LAUGHING, BUT INSTANTLY REALIZED THAT I DID NOT HAVE ENOUGH AIR. AS I SANK, WITH MY BROTHER HOLDING ONTO MY HEAD AND NECK, MY FEET HIT THE 8 FOOT BOTTOM, MAKING ME TEMPORARILY STABLE ENOUGH FOR MY BROTHER TO USE HIS FEET TO PUSH OFF MY SHOULDERS, AND PADDLE BACK TO SAFETY. A COUPLE OF IRONIES: MY PARENTS NEVER FOUND OUT THAT THEY ALMOST LOST 2 SONS THAT DAY, AND ALL THREE OF US BOYS GREW UP TO BE LIFEGUARDS.

Whether in water or in life, drowning people, even if they love you tremendously, can and will drag you down with them. They are dying. Your job, your goal, your DUTY, is to help them, without endangering or sacrificing yourself. Become a lifeguard: know dangerous areas and dangerous situations in and around you and yourContinue reading “YEARS AGO, MY YOUNGEST BROTHER AND I ALMOST DROWNED TOGETHER. I’M THE ELDEST OF THREE BOYS. WE THREE WERE SWIMMING AT MY ADULT COUSINS’ APARTMENT COMPLEX’S POOL. NO LIFEGUARD ON DUTY. OUR PARENTS, WHO HAD SENT US TO THE POOL, WERE VISITING MY COUSINS, UPSTAIRS, ABOUT 50 YARDS AWAY. I WAS ABOUT 9 YEARS OLD. MY TWO BROTHERS WERE 7 AND 6 YEARS OLD. THE YOUNGEST WOULD JUMP OFF THE SIDE INTO 8 FEET OF WATER, AND THEN FURIOUSLY DOGGY PADDLE BACK TO SAFETY. THIS WOULD WORK IF HE WERE MORE HORIZONTAL WHEN PADDLING, BUT THIS ONE TIME HE WAS BOBBING VERTICALLY. SO, DOG PADDLING ONLY MADE HIM BOB UP AND DOWN MORE VIGOROUSLY, SPLASHING WATER UP INTO HIS FACE. HE BECAME PANICKED. I SAW HIM AND JUMPED IN TO HELP. MY LOVING BROTHER GRABBED ME, CLIMBED ON TOP OF ME, PUSHING ME UNDER. I WAS LAUGHING, BUT INSTANTLY REALIZED THAT I DID NOT HAVE ENOUGH AIR. AS I SANK, WITH MY BROTHER HOLDING ONTO MY HEAD AND NECK, MY FEET HIT THE 8 FOOT BOTTOM, MAKING ME TEMPORARILY STABLE ENOUGH FOR MY BROTHER TO USE HIS FEET TO PUSH OFF MY SHOULDERS, AND PADDLE BACK TO SAFETY. A COUPLE OF IRONIES: MY PARENTS NEVER FOUND OUT THAT THEY ALMOST LOST 2 SONS THAT DAY, AND ALL THREE OF US BOYS GREW UP TO BE LIFEGUARDS.”

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